How to Manage Expectations When Planning Your Wedding
- Charlotte Latjes
- Feb 7
- 3 min read
Planning your Big Day is a fascinating, joyful, and anticipated journey. While you feel all those exhilarating butterflies in your stomach, it's also important to acknowledge that this phase comes with its own set of expectations that can sometimes induce pressure and anxiety. Keep reading if you want to learn how to manage expectations when planning your wedding.
The Pressure of Being Engaged
In our fast-paced world, where wedding planning can feel like a grand performance, acknowledging and understanding these expectations can give you much peace of mind while you are in the process. From the moment the big question is popped, society showers you with expectations on what to do when planning your wedding. Every decision is open to discussion, from the clothes you wear to your venue's glamour and the guest list size. With images splashed across social media and bridal magazines showcasing the so-called "perfect wedding," it's easy to feel overwhelmed by these lofty ideals. While it might feel like you "should" conform to such standards, it's vital to remember that every couple's journey is distinctly unique. Your celebration revolves around love and commitment (not societal pressure!).
You're not unhappy, you're just busy
One prevailing expectation set on couples is the almost relentless pursuit of perfection. There seems to be an unwritten requirement to embody a specific image—radiant, composed, and joyfully impeccable throughout the planning and the Big Day. But preparing emotionally for this life transformation is not just sunshine and roses. You can experience feelings you didn't necessarily expect —excitement, stress, anxiety, and even doubt. Embracing these emotions does not mean you are unhappy or don't want to commit; on the contrary, they tell you you are thinking this through and allowing yourself to feel. Something I often hear is that when you get engaged, there is the expectation that you have a clear vision for your wedding from day one. This anticipation can feel quite daunting when faced with myriad decisions—from selecting vendors to curating the guest list. Remember that it's perfectly acceptable not to have every detail figured out immediately. Granting yourself the grace to explore different ideas and make decisions at your rhythm can contribute to a more rewarding and enjoyable planning experience.
convention vs. what you need
The conversation surrounding traditional roles is another essential facet of the expectations placed on couples. Conventional norms sometimes dictate the level of involvement each partner has in planning, often putting the lion's share of responsibilities on one individual. As a couple, don't forget you are partners, and sharing the planning and decision-making responsibilities is a great way to bond and ease any feelings of overwhelm. Don't forget to prioritize self-care amidst the whirlwind of preparations! In the busyness of planning, it's easy to overlook the importance of taking time for yourself. Practicing self-care is vital in counteracting external expectations and pressures. Whether stepping back from planning, immersing yourself in a beloved hobby, or cherishing precious moments with loved ones, safeguarding your mental health is key to staying balanced and grounded throughout this exciting time. And remember, your wedding day is ultimately a celebration of love uniquely shared between you and your partner. While it's easy to become enmeshed in the expectations swirling around you, consistently bringing your focus back to the core purpose of the celebration will guide you in creating a day that beautifully reflects your personal story rather than one formed by outside pressures.
recognize the pressure
The expectations placed upon couples during the wedding planning process can feel overwhelming. However, by recognizing these pressures, valuing authenticity, and engaging in open communication, you can navigate this exciting journey with grace and poise. Embrace the quirks and imperfections, seek support from those who love you, and, most importantly, concentrate on what truly matters as you step into this fantastic new chapter of your life. Your journey is uniquely yours—allow it to unfold in a way that brings you joy and genuine connection!
How to Manage Expectations When Planning Your Wedding.
If you would like to learn some effective strategies for managing stress and anxiety during the wedding planning process or how to communicate effectively as a couple, please contact me for a free 30-minute call.




